How can I learn to be more confident?
I'm smart, people always tell me I'm gorgeous, I have an amazing boyfriend, I have many many friends and my family is great.
WHY the f*** don't I have self- esteem? I'm extra sensitive, incredibly jealous, very paranoid, i'm trapped in vanity and and I am always looking for my imperfections (mostly physical). HELP ME
Answers:
confindence is not something u can learn its just something u develop. gorgeous and good looking people always look for the slightest imperfection in themselves physically. personall people say my back muscles are fine but im not satisfied and i want to get bigger. i dont know y u dont have self esteem ur good looking u have a boyfriend lots of friends and family that should be reason to have high self esteem. jelous well im not jelous ever but u cant help that, paranoid anyone can be depending on their mood and extra sensitive how sensitive we talking here do u cry when the sun sets , that sensitive?
it takes years, but you'll ge there. you have to just believe people when they give you compliments, and work on why you feel this way in the first place. if you can, go to a counselor and talk all of it out on a regualr basis with someone who won't just sit there and say "of course you're pretty/smart/whatever!" but will offer you constructive ways to build your self-esteem.
also go to public places alone on a regular basis. see a movie, eat in a fancy restaruant, go shopping, etc. it sucks at first but after awhile you just don't give a s--- what people think.
Just think. every girl has this problem. You're beautiful. Your friends know it, your boyfriend(s) know it, you should know it. What is wrong with you physically? Why does it matter so much? Your boyfriend loves you, your friends love you, your FAMILY loves you? You are very fortunate, you probably look better and have it better than a LOT of other people. Keep thinking. NOBODY is perfect. Someday you will grow out of this and hopefully learn to love yourself, then you will become confident.
I understand it's hard sometimes to accept complements you think their only saying it to cheer you up but the fact of the matter is everybody as a unique way about them witch makes them special you just have to realize that were not perfect we are only human but that doesn't mean that we aren't special and to somebody else have good faith and good things will come to you I know.
looks over-smart...try to understand the earthy world..!! before analizing others, first try to understand self deeply.
you need to build up your self- esteem first before building up your confidence.
Go to http://www.lifepositive.com/mind/personal-growth/self-love/esteem.asp
http://www.thesite.org/healthandwellbeing/mentalhealth/bodyimageandselfesteem/buildingselfesteem
http://www.resiliency.com/htm/build.htm
http://www.oncourseworkshop.com/Esteem006.htm
to start building up self- esteem
you can learn how to be more confident by believe yourself.
Learn to love yourself first. Also, develop a personal relationship with GOD. He can give you your self-esteem. That is something that will take time if it is low. Get to know yourself better. Take time out for you. Think about what is best for you to feel good. Don't worry about what others say about your life. You will always know what your needs are better than others. Love yourself girl. All that you need and desire is in Jesus. He will help you develop all that you desire. I always mention GOD because you can't accomplish anything without HIM. All things are possible thru Jesus. He will make a way out of no way. Pray about it.
You sound like me a little. I have always been overly sensitive and need to be more confident with myself and hopefully that i make the right choices that won't pull me down.
since it sounds like all of this is in your mind u might consider a psychiatrist, u might have bdd -(look it up )or something - its OK
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