i am a cutter. How can i stop? and my rents' think i'm an idiot for doing it, they think i do it for attention

well i cut myself when i feel any overwelming feeling of sadness, anger, hatred. etc here's one problem i had at school

well I did it cause I was not bored I was totally pissed off at the whole world and in a matter of seconds I had grabbed her scissors and done it and I cried in the girls toilet because I was so upset that I had done it and I didn't think I would go to that extreme and do something so wacko like what mental peeps do I was scared to think I would do it again and I didn't know how to stop honestly I was like some sicko who didn't know how to deal with her issues.I was a fruit cake, I prayed about it and it didn't work it’s like god doesn’t care at all like he hated me. I didn't know what to do so I lied about it.!

I did it again this afternoon because i was stitting in a tree when one of the gals that tease me pushed me down out of the tree and i rolled away and hit my head on a branch and cut it open and sprained my wrist which is now bandaged up. Help am mad!

Answers:
The key is to learn how to identify your emotions, triggers, and stressors, so that you can learn how to better deal with them in the future, or how to avoid or lessen them. Allow yourself to hurt and to be angry and to feel guilt, but also remember that you have to learn how to deal with these things and how to ease them. Important

Every one of us is different. We all SI for different reasons and in different ways. If none of these suggestions work for you, then don't give up. Change them. Try something totally different, or do the same things in unusual ways. Individualise your coping methods. Tailor them so they fit you snuggly and comfortable. Maybe instead of writing you can use a tape recorder. Or instead of doing something nice for yourself, do something for someone else. There are many ways for us to heal, and not everything that works for someone else works for us.
Don't give up. Keep trying, and remember to try each thing you think of more than once, because it takes time to get used to new habits and get rid of the old.
And no one is perfect, but if you can go three days, or eight, or thirty without SI'ing, then remember that you may have SI'ed, but you went without it for a time. Every bit of progress is great, but too often we don't recognise it as a forward motion. The fact that you went 8 days without SI'ing is much more important than the fact that you did end up hurting yourself.
The three things that help me not to cut the most:
1. Wearing long sleeves. See, I rub at my scars a lot, and sometimes looking at them makes me want to cut. I have problems bathing when I am in a cutting mood, because it means I have to see the cuts. I have found that keeping them covered, even at night, helps me avoid cutting.
2. Writing or painting about self injury helps me. Either writing about it, or writing out coping methods (like now). It helps get it outta my head. It doesn't really bring any special awareness, but it does keep me busy, especially mentally. It takes the emotional edge off.
3. A support group with other SIs that I can talk. It's obvious your husband is not giving you the support you need. this one is on-line

You can contact me anytime I have other helps also.

It is hard to stop

It's a habit just like nail biting or nose picking and it usually serves some sort of purpose in your life.

You can only stop this if you REALLY WANT TO STOP. It won't work if you are trying to stop for someone else. You have to want it.

You will need to find and work with a therapist who is good and kind and understanding about you.

It will involve a fair bit of soul searching and self analysis to try and understand why the impulse comes about. You already know that you don't want to have it (or so it appears when I read your post).

Then it is about finding alternative behaviours and substituting them or developing the ability to mentally challenge the impulse.

This process is called Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (or cognitive therapy)
Get some psychological help as soon as you can.
Yikes.

Sweetheart, why would you destroy something as beautiful and unique as yourself? There is only one of you.

I recognize your condition and I want to tell you what you probably have already heard, or don't want to do.

You need to go to a doctor and tell them what's going on. Having mental pain is common, and releasing that pain by producing a physical pain is easier fro us to comprehend. We can see the cut, feel it bleed, clean it up and bandage it. That is not so easy when we have a mental pain like that. There is no Band Aid for our anger or rage or sadness.

Go get help. Your body is beautiful, and no one should harm itlike that.
Cutting is often used as a method of giving a physical aspect to some sort of mental pain. This could be guilt, anger, sadness, etc.

Often, the problem isn't really the cutting, it's what causes you to feel you need to do this.

I know first hand, the way it feels. It does feel shameful afterwards, but at the moment it seems appropriate.

My suggestion would be to look into therapy. CBT (Cognative Behavioural Therapy) is a very good type of therapy designed to help people think things through before reacting. It's often used with people who act irrationally (panic attacks/etc) to help them view their reactions from another point of view. Perhaps something of this nature might be useful to you.

Regardless, I think the key would be in figuring out why you do it. You're probably right, it's not for attention. There are much easier ways to get attention. This is a legitimate problem, just like any sort of flu or fever. You need to get some help. Not to sound mean. It's just too hard to go through life on your own. everyone needs some help along the way. Find someone you can trust who is willing to help you. If you can't find a trained professional you trust, then find a good friend who actually cares about you and will dedicate the time you need.
I knew this chick who used to cut herself, but never with intend to kill herself. It had to do with her mother rejecting her that caused her to feel worthless. After she settled down and had her own happy little family, she stopped. But she had a lot of broken relationships before she got there. Good luck.
As somebody who has been through the exact same thing, I can understand your pain and confusion. I also understand that you feel better once you do it but trust me nothing will feel as good as you will when you stop.
Now this decision is by no means an easy one b/c I doubt you are doing this for giggles. Somehow the cutting makes your internal pain feel like it is less than the pain you feel when you cut.
I too felt suprised at my own impulses and behaviors and because I felt like it was unlike me I wanted to remember what me felt like.
So here is what I did.I wrote down all the good life experiences dating back as far as possible. It made me think of the person I was when I liked myself and when I was happy. This I feel is a critical step because it made me remember how much I like myself. When you do this my dear you will find the reason that will make you stop because you love yourself.
I hope my words make you feel better because I wrote them from the heart.
Best Wishes
Honey, you need to find somebody to talk to about your issues and what's bothering you, be it a teacher, a counselor, a family member,. You're obviously angry, you kind of have the right to honestly, and you cutting yourself is a way to vent out. Whenever you feel the need to express yourself I suggest you do sth other than cutting yourself, sth positive. You will probably grow out of it though, I mean you only have intense emotions right now specially that you sound like you're in your teens. Remember it's all about expressing your emotions, instead of cutting try to draw, write poetry, smash things or even scream your lungs out!
Good Luck! Feel free to IM me if you want to.
You got some good advice already above..

I think it's like quiting cigarettes, you have to figure out what your going to do INSTEAD of smoking (cutting) when you get the urge. The urge only last a couple minutes so you do what you planned to do instead (somthing healthier).

Make a plan and do it.
I feel for you. I've known some cutters. They were depressed and not happy with themselves. Please seek professional help because it is extremely hard to quit on your own. I can tell that you don't want to continue on doing this. You are seeking out help now by telling us this on the AnyQA.coms, but you need some one on one help from someone that is trained to help you stop cutting.

God does love you and don't you forget it! Be happy, life is for living and not for hurting yourself. Life is hard enough without hurting yourself. I wish you the best. Check out the two websites below for more information.
i was one..and went to the hostpital for it..


but all im going to say is that it looks like you do want attention for advertising it on the computer..


you just need to find that one person that can help you threw it..and if you keep doing it you will cut so deep you could die.

so think about it..i sleep all day insted of doing it.cutting if prob healthier than sleeping all day but o well atleast i dont do it anymore..


good luck
honey, i understand. I'm sick of hearing "oh, she's just doing it for attention". I know its hard, I'm a recovering cutter, it is so hard!! God is there, i know that, but often I feel he doesn't care! There is nothing wrong with you, its just the way you feel. But trust me, I know what you're going through!
Im a little confused. First you say you dont do it for attention, but then you sya you do it so someone will notice and give you help.. isnt that getting attention? And if your already in counselling, isnt that help?

Cutting is a serious problem .. and if your just using it for attention or w/e I suggest you stop. However, if your not and you seriously have a problem, if you put up your email ll add you to msn . how old are you ?
I used to cut myself when I was extremely emotionally upset. I know U R NOT doing it for the attention.

For me it was as though the feelings inside of me were to big for me to handle. I was frustrated, angry, fearful, felt rejected, and it seemed that no one understood the amount of internal emotional pain I was suffering.

The cutting seemed to give me something tangible, something i could physically see. It was as if the internal pain was turned into something I could take care of and make better.

I didn't want to hurt myself, nor was I trying to get attention. What I really needed was to get help for the pain and "bleeding" inside of me, so that I no longer had to externalize it.

A good therapist is hard to find, but it is worth looking around until U find someone U really feel a connection with. Medication can help too. Don't ignore this aspect of treatment. Sometimes our brains also get chemicaly "out of wack," sometimes caused by internal factors, and sometimes the other way around.

U need to get help. What these people are doing to you is sick. U need to find out how to cope with these peeps from a professional.

Please get yourself help hun, because nobody deserves to suffer as U do. I got help, both psychological and medical. I have no desire to cut anymore because I no longer hurt on the inside. There are people out there who are decent and will not treat U as these peeps U talk about have.

Here is a great place to start to understand what is going on with the cutting and hear what others like U are doing to get themselves healthy again. There are also chat and support groups at the site:

http://www.healthyplace.com

Please take care of yourself hun, and DO check out this site! Go to the section called "self injury."

~from one who knows the pain, and who cares~

Good luck .and never give up! There is sunshine, and warm smiles out there.
talk to a counselor at school or call your local crisis helpline. This is a serious condition and your parents should take it more seriously. Sometimes parents don't fully understand the stress that high schoolers are under and the tend to devalue their opinions until another adult talks to them about it.
I hope this helps
Love
Rivka
hey i have a friend kinda like u but she is balimic and can't stop i finnaly told her that i was going to try to help her as much as i could but afterwords i wouldnt be her friend because i told her to stop when she could and she didnt listen to me. and well this is how i hellped her. ( when ever you evre feel overwellmed or think that u want to become over skinny just stop wat u are doing and just breath cause its like a whole difrent world when you just stop and breathe and uy can actualy help u from hurting urself.) well it didn't work for her becasue she was way to in the balimia aspect meanning she couldnt stop with out real help like from a doctor. but i recomend to you that you go and talk to your best friend about it and say why u are so overwellmed or something that will make u un angry like Happy. write me back and tell me how u are doing.
Honey, this is a hard thing to get over. I am sorry that no one has been able to help you so far. I feel very bad for you and wish I could help you somehow.

The kids in your school sound like vicious freaks.

Good luck to you.

NO ONE WITH ANY BRAINS THINKS YOU ARE DOING IT FOR ATTENTION.
There is alot of good advice written above. Stick with the doc and/or counceling. It takes time to get to the root of your problems, and believe me there is a big problem here somewhere. Do not dismiss the depression too easily.
You are disturbed.seriously.get help.become an actor to get the attention you are craving..cuz you obivously have a flare for drama..and if that doesn't work cut a little deeper and put your parents out of their misery.there is no such thing as a cutter.there are just idiots and non-idiots.go prostitute that way you can make money while you are destroying your body..and you can have a reason to loathe yourself.do you understand that people in the world have actual problems.so unless you are literally starving.homeless.getting molested everynight..been raped repeatedly.had your home burned down.or lost a child to a war you wanted nothing to do with.get over yourself. If you you cut too deep.it's not exactly a loss to the world. Get help.
Change doctors and/or go or call to the local psych hospital and tell on yourself. I know what it feels like when you are so angry you think you might explode if you don't relieve the pressure somehow. It can't help that you are getting no support/compassion from your parents. Please get help that works for you! You don't sound so suicidal as just plain FED UP. Find some one you can trust to talk about this and in the mean time try substituting some thing else less harmful. You obviously care about your life or you wouldn't be asking..
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